Lyric analysis: "Iris" by Goo Goo Dolls

[tobiahawk.livejournal.com]

So, some months ago, some brilliant LJer (unfortunately, I can't remember who--if it was you, come and take credit!) figured out that "Iris" was probably the slow, popular Goo Goo Dolls song that Rachel and Tobias were dancing to at the school dance in 33. After listening to the lyrics, I think it actually fits wonderfully with the scene and the characters. Accordingly, I wrote up a Rachel-centric lyric analysis for it. 
     


And I'd give up forever to touch you'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
Rachel would take Tobias out of the war ("give up forever") to be with him as a human ("touch you"). He is one of the only people she feels comfortable with and that she feels "gets" her, darkness and all.

You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever beAnd I don't want to go home right now
Literally, when Rachel is flying with Tobias, she is the "close to heaven," both literally in the sky and figuratively out of the sheer joy of flight. More metaphorically, dancing with a boy she loves--or at least cares deeply about--at a dance is a moment of happiness and joy ("heaven") in contrast to the brutal, hellish state of war the Animorphs live in. When the dance ends and they go home, Tobias will be a bird again and Rachel will be the secret warrior she has become, her teenager life mostly a series of lies and facades.

And all I can taste is this momentAnd all I can breathe is your life'Cause sooner or later it's overI just don't want to miss you tonight

Thus, Rachel is captivated by this moment--at a dance, with Tobias human and safe in her arms and she in his. She doesn't want to it end--but she knows it will. Tobias will demorph and go to the woods. The dance will end. A new mission will begin. One or more of them might die. But this moment, this simple, innocent teenage moment--she doesn't want that to end. She grasps onto it, because, in a sense, she knows tonight may be all the "normal" that they ever have.

Chorus: And I don't want the world to see me'Cause I don't think that they'd understandWhen everything's made to be brokenI just want you to know who I am
Rachel knows if anyone say who she is really is, her dark, violent, blood thirsty side, they would be horrified and terrified ("And I don't want the world to see me/ 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand"). Their world and their minds are on the constant verge of being shuttered by the war ("When everything's made to be broken"), and Rachel desperately needs Tobias--and herself--to know she's capable of being a normal, loving human girlfriend ("I just want you to know who I am."). In order to do that, she needs Tobias to be human as well. 
  
And you can't fight the tears that ain't comingOr the moment of truth in your liesWhen everything feels like the moviesYeah you bleed just to know you're alive
Rachel feels she is becoming less and less human, as her life is consumed by the almost unreal, unimaginable war ("When everything feels like the movies"), and she knows it, even if she doesn't want to admit it ("That moment of truth in your lives"). Rather than crying to deal with her fear and trauma ("You can't fight the tears that ain't coming"), Rachel becomes addicted to the adrenaline of violence and action as a way to remind herself who she is ("You bleed just to know you're alive.")

[chorus x3]
I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am
"I just want you to know who I am" is in many ways the key point of the Tobias and Rachel relationship, They see each other as the person who can both fully see and accept their "predator" aspects and yet fully embrace their humanity as well. They rely on each other to confirm their humanity in spite of their dark or (literally) wild sides. As another LJer said in one of the character discussions (again, kudos), they use each other as a way to remind themselves of and maintain their humanity.

Thoughts?

Comments

[ferahgo.livejournal.com]

I've always loved this song and I think your analysis of its relevance to Tobias and Rachel is perfect!

[tobiahawk.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Love the icon, btw! :)

[with-rainfall.livejournal.com]

That's a really good analysis. It's actually making me tear up - I don't know, I've never been an R/T fanatic, but something about the way you phrased that just makes me feel sad for Rachel. She's loving at heart, and we never really get the actual dance in that book. It should be an innocent, even intimate moment between them, but the sad thing is that Tobias doesn't even give any sign that he's enjoying it. He just keeps talking about how uncomfortable he is and how he wants to go home. It's never really described in the book, so it's lovely to have your analysis here.

The lyrics to that song are pretty generic, in the sense that they can apply to a lot of pairings, but I think that song could conveivably be from Tobias' POV, too. Not in this scene, sadly, but in the rest of the series.

I'd give up forever to touch you
I wish we'd had a romantic moment between them (like a kiss or a dance or a hug) where Tobias considered, even briefly, staying human because he loved her. Not because she asked him to, or because he felt compelled by her, but because he'd finally got comfortable with human touch and realised how little time they actually got to spend with each other as humans.
/plotbunny

[pipry23.livejournal.com]

Beautifully put. Thanks for posting this. Rachel is so inspiring and heartbreaking and you really showed why in this. Le sigh.