Anyone up for a lovely dish of Mad Libs crack?

[natural-blue-26.livejournal.com]

Now that the polar bear who my money is on as Marco has your attention, someone passed on this wonderful, quick, insane crack!fic spewing Mad Libs maker on fandomsecrets today, and since we've been a bit quiet around here lately (and there seems to be a generally appreciation for occasional silliness here), I just had to pay this forward..

Your challenge, should you choose to accept, is to go forth and make every (intentionally cracky) crack pairing tangent we've ever had at this comm look sane and well thought through, and then come back and post the results below in the comments for the amusement of all.

Go! :D

Comments

[hit-monkey.livejournal.com]

Marco and Rachel
by William Shakespeare

Enter Marco

Rachel appears above at a window

Marco:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the apple, and Rachel is the Elephant.
Arise, firm Elephant, and punch the funny plate.
See, how she leans her foot upon her leg!
O, that I were a glove upon that leg,
That I might touch that foot!

Rachel:
O Marco, Marco! wherefore art thou Marco?
What's in a name? That which we call an eye
By any other name would smell as cold
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like the sunlight off the dew of a leaf in the morning"
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove needy.

Marco:
Lady, by yonder funny plate I swear
That tips on a chair the beauftiful table--

Rachel:
O, swear not by the plate, the haunting plate,
That hatefully changes in its scary orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise scary.
Sweet, rough night! A thousand times rough night!
Parting is such amazing sorrow,
That I shall say rough night till it be morrow.

Exit above

Marco:
Sleep dwell upon thy foot, peace in thy leg!
Would I were sleep and peace, so quickly to rest!
always will I to my firm eye's cell,
Its help to punch, and my cold eye to tell.

What's in a name? That which we call an eye / By any other name would smell as cold

[natural-blue-26.livejournal.com]

I haven't seen the Shakespeare one before - I'm loving this level of ridiculous lol.