animorphslj | Series Re-Read #33 The Illusion

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Series Re-Read #33 The Illusion

The anti-morphing ray is still in development, and still has to be stopped. So the group comes up with a plan. Tobias will morph Ax and get himself captured. When he demorphs to hawk, the Yeerks will hit him with the ray and think it doesn't work.

I have a hard time re-reading this one because of all the angst.

Do you think they did adequate follow-up with this book, handled Tobias's aftermath well enough? I'm not sure what I think.

Taylor's an interesting character, the whole Yeerk/host merging thingy that we find out about her. And of course she comes back in The Test.

Also interesting that Tobias didn't want to kill her in the end...I suppose he didn't want Rachel to kill her if she wasn't a direct threat anymore...if they weren't defending themselves or something like that.

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"Your time is up. Do you understand that? You can never escape your
morph. You will be a bird till you die."
Who said that? Rachel? Taylor, the sub-visser?
Me?

this book...god the tobias-loving mini me got such a mindfuck from this book in elementary school ;_;
This is just a sick book. Awesome sick, but also scary Animorphs dark sick. Taylor, all messed up, not sure whether she's the yeerk or the kid, talking to Tobias while she tortures him. Tobias freaking out and dealing with his usual hawk/boy routine.
Longevity in the wild...A generous estimate: eighteen years.
THIS IS SCARY

I think Tobias didn't want to be evil :( I think he didn't see Rachel's strength and suddenly feel pity for Taylor, I think he saw that terrifying ruthless Rachel and didn't want to kill vicariously through her. Especially because he felt that confusing Girl/Yeerk Boy/Hawk connection. I mean, if he let her bash Taylor's head in, he'd feel like a murderer. "Be Rachel, not her"...well if I shipped Rachel/Tobias it would fill my heart with that tingly feeling, but aside from that, i think rachel's capacity for causing pain might've scared him a little then idk it's like two a.m.

RACHEL/TOBIAS KISS AND HUG AND AWWW AND THEN THEY FLY AWAY INTO THE SUNSET~

I think his "aftermath" could've been done more, but I don't think it needed to be. The Animorphs are all kind of fucked up but they're fucked up together and they never really get a "recovering from trauma" break and they don't get the chance to really deal with their demons, sometimes. Sooo if Rachel is enough for Tobias, it is enough for me too

Jake's my age. But there are times when his eyes are the
eyes of a tired old man.
lol old man Jake ilu

in short:

-SOOO MUCH RACHEL/TOBIAS
-SOOO MUCH PAAIIINNNN

favorite quotes that are not angsty
"We do not think the Yeerks built this community center out of concern for the community."
"Use a strawberry. Ax! Use a strawberry!"
"Shut up, Chapman," the girl said calmly. "You sound like some pun-spouting villain from a Batman movie."
"I'm glad you made it Tobias. You're our eyes. Our ears. Our air force. If
we lost you we'd be nothing Like Joan of Arc without her sword. Patton without his pearl-handled pistols .. ."
"Because cigarettes can kill you," I answered. "That is, if a golden
eagle or a case of coccidiosis doesn't get you first."

Edited 2010-03-01 07:24 (UTC)

I think this is probably the last really good book in the series.

I like other ones, and to be honest, I don't like this one, but it is very, very good. How much of its quality is deliberate or accidental will be discussed in the following comment!

Okay, so first of all, I want to talk about one of my favorite chapters in the entire series:

<I mean, we are related, are we not? You are not Andalite, exactly, but you carry the Andalite heritage. I am glad you will have that DNA in you from now on. It is a very unique genetic mixture...I do hold the Andalites in very high regard. It is true. But it isn't an unthinking allegiance. I honestly admire my culture. There are things I would like to teach you, to share with you if you are interested.> 33

"My tail! Unexpected. Yet an extension so natural I'd almost failed to notice how I carried it, erect and steadied at about shoulder level." 34

"And then I recognized the Andalite mind. Yes, it was all the things I'd imagined it would be. Confident. Alert. Poised for combat. But there was another element that took me off guard. Something bubbling up happily away beneath the rationality. Nothing giddy like a dolphin's playfulness. Something less simple. Optimism. That was it. Intense optimism." 35

<Keep in mind that you are experiencing instinct. The Andalite mind in its untrained state. Our culture teaches us to temper and control our optimism, to give equal value to realism. We have become, regrettably, a race of warriors. But that is in response to necessity. Down deeper, beneath that, I believe we are a peaceful species, in love with learning, not combat. But to learn--and to fight--you must be joyful.< 35

<Tail blade carvings. Made by early Andalites. Mostly in the rocky outcroppings on the shores of the Elupera. We toured them once when I was much younger...In fact, it was on shormitors of the Elupera that I learned the early tail-fighting masters spent a lifetime trying to cultivate and listen to instinct. Trying to forget what culture had taught them. Let the innate defense mechanism kick in, as you humans say.> 35

<A move I rely on frequently. The torf. You begin a common strike and then, millimeters from impact, twist your blade to the side so that only the flat of the blade connects with the target. It won't do much to a Hork-Bajir, but it will knock a human unconscious.> 36

<From the rising of the sun to the setting, to its rising again, we place what is hard to endure with what is sweet to remember, and we find peace.> 38

I immediately love any chapter that goes into any detail about Andalite culture.

I mean, reading these quotes again, I do have a couple of "really?" reactions. Like the optimism thing makes total sense based on how Andalites are characterized--optimism is about 2 degrees of pride away from out-and-out hubris--but at the same time, I think it contradicts the prehistoric development Andalites got in TEC. Dolphins are happy and care-free because they're at the top of the food chain. Same with humans. At least, that's what gave us all the time to fuck around with wheels and telescopes and nuclear bombs. Prey animals are generally skittish, paranoid, always on the lookout. Maybe this is more a complaint about TEC than this book, but I don't feel like the overall quantity of information we get about Andalites jibes together, even though I love all of it.

So, idk, if we ever do a poll of "favorite chapter in the series," I definitely nominate Chapter 6 from #33. And the chapter at the end of TAC when the Ellimist came and took Elfangor away :( I think that one would win.

I don't have my book (out of town, boo), so I'm going off memory: doesn't Taylor say she has control over his pleasure/pain and therefore reward centers? If she doesn't, ignore me.

I was just doing some arbitrary research on dopamine and reward centers awhile back, so I CAN HAZ MOAR SCIENCE PLZ. I'm curious.

However, a note:
Part of that idly Internet research involved an article on Psychology Today (http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/200911/supersize-orgasms) (note: article title NSFW--it's about women's Viagra) about hammering the reward centers and how it's made some people just go nuts and engage in risky behaviors they otherwise wouldn't have thought of. When the dopamine abuse stopped (meaning they went off the drug), the risky behavior ended.

Risky like... going hawk completely? Selling out everyone minus Rachel?

Just a thought.

About the follow-up with the book on Tobias' aftermath, I think all that happened were a few episodes where Cassie briefly mentions Tobias had gone through some dark period, or something along those lines... (and only Cassie mentioned it... not sure if Rachel did) and of course, #43. But I think there wasn't sufficient development on the part of Tobias' character, like it didn't come across as being such an ordeal in #43, and it didn't seem to show a lot how it impacted the way he did things, other than him becoming more subdued.

Totally agree about the angst and violence that made twelve-year-old me freak out a little. Liked the character insight when Tobias' memories come pouring back.

And of course. T/R MOMENTS! I thought the dance bit was a bit awkward, like how Rachel tried to put on an act and stall Tobias. It felt totally out of place imo. But the last chapter was lovely (:

I hate when people preface their comments with some excuse, but I'm high as a kite so please excuse it if this makes no sense.

I'm reading over the first few chapters and they are amazing. Rachel and Tobias...he can't trust that she isn't trying to trap him in morph. And being chased by one of his old teachers? I can feel for that teacher...maybe helping Tobias out before, being worried about the kid. And then Tobias vanishes and he forgets to find out, but it still bothers him. Then he sees Tobias and he realizes that this is is chance to redeem himself or something.

THEN, the scene where a girl says hi to jake (flirt) and Jake can't remember her name at first. Beautiful.

THEN, Tobias notes that he can't trust Jake's motives or anything he says. Jake used to be open but now he's sometimes saying things to use people.

In the barn, Tobias notices that something's up with Jake's reactions but Jake won't suggest Tobias go himself...so he waits until Tobias does it. I'm sure if Tobias refused to say anything, Jake would have adorned the meeting and told everyone to sleep on it.

Small things:

I saw the confirmation in Jake's eyes. And in the hologram that gave
Erek eyes.

Marco clicked about a second later.[...]

Cassie nodded, reluctant. Rachel kept her eyes down. She was biting her
lip. Angry, sad: the two emotions are very close together in Rachel.

This entire scene characterizes so perfectly. I can just see how this worked in my head. Tobias has really character-penetrating thoughts on his friends; he probably understands them just as well as Jake.

more later?

I love how this ghostwriter seems to nail down small moments of characterization.

After Tobias announces he'll go:

Cassie first, with that look of tender knowing she reserves for moments
of significance. I could tell she was proud of me. And worried.
This image is very motherly. It's interesting because I think this was how Cassie should have been portrayed all the time. She feels for her friends in a very emotional mother-love kind of way and she's proud of them for what they're doing. She knows it has to be done, but she's grieving too. But there's something queen-like about her.

Rachel's eyes were different. Dark, almost stricken.

Marco sent an ironic bow in my direction. "You're right, Tobias. Don't
you wish you weren't?"
Jake made a face I see too often. It's a look of disgust. Disgust with
himself. He hadn't wanted to single me out, make me go on what might be
a suicidal mission. He'd waited till I could volunteer.

< Tobias is correct, > Ax said. < But the mission could last longer than
two hours. To play the part convincingly - to make the Yeerks think
you're an Andalite in morph - you will have to "demorph" to Andalite. >

GREAT reactions.

Honestly? If we had to take votes for the best Animorphs scene, I would vote for this:

"Such filthy insects. Allow me to . . ." He swung at Jake. Jake's hand
shot up. He grabbed the Visser's wrist in his fist.

For a long few seconds the two of them glared at each other. Visser
Three, leader of the Yeerk forces on Earth. And Jake, his unrecognized foe.
[..]

Jake released the Visser's hand. Jake smiled. The Visser smiled. Or at
least they formed their mouths into smiles.

[...]

< Yeah. I think I'm in Jake's shirt pocket. > Then she laughed. < The
Visser just told Jake he hoped he didn't scare him. Jake said, "I don't
scare easy." >

I adore this so much.

I CAN'T BELIEVE I FORGOT ABOUT THIS THIS WEEK THIS IS LIKE MY FAVORITEST BOOK OF ALL

BRB WRITING GIANT-ASS COMMENT ABOUT WHY IT IS SO AWESOME

Does the Erek smoking part make sense to *anyone*? Erek isn't smoking; his yeerk is. When Chapman "busts" him, he'll be wondering why Erek's Yeerk wants to make the Sharing look bad. The reason these kids don't rebel is because they're controllers and they can't. Unless their Yeerk was looking for a fix.

Are there Yeerk nicotine addicts?

i love the entire opening scene so much, the way tobias is so awkward and uncomfortable, and rachel wants to be having fun but is mostly just kind of pissed off. and for the record, i use marco's "hah. hah. and also, a bonus hah" line all the time.

"You're saying you'd rather be sitting up in your tree, watching owls eat nocturnal rodents, than be with me?" she asked. Her tone was somewhere between challenging and coy. Dangerous in either direction.
they're so tragically fucked up ;_; i actually think their relationship is one of the most consistently written things in the series (unlike rachel's characterization ahem ahem). they always care deeply about each other, tobias is always afraid to give in too far to something he loves, rachel always wants him to be happy but refuses to see that he is, in fact, happier this way because she can't deal with that being true. they both on the one hand want to make the other happy more than almost anything, and on the other hand know on some level they can't give the other what they want.

We'd been through this before. I didn't know how to answer. And I didn't know why she was pushing it.
another example of the above. they're stuck.

Why was Rachel ignoring reality? She knew as well as anyone that I'd be out of the fight if I stayed more than two hours in human form.
this sheds some light, for me, on their whole conflict about whether or not tobias should go human. i think while rachel wouldn't admit this to herself, the fact that he'd be out of the fight is part of the appeal for her of tobias going human. like she says later (in a bit of dialogue i really love):

She paused to consider her next words. She was embarrassed by what she was about to say. Fighting to get past her embarrassment. "But you've got to realize that there's more. I'm not just a warrior," she said, her blue eyes glittering so close to mine. "I'm a girl. I'm trying not to let myself be dragged off the cliff, away from all normalcy, into this insane life we live. I don't like what it does to me, Tobias, and I need to be a girl again. I need a little bit of normalcy, okay? Not a lot, but some."
i don't think it's just that rachel wants a boyfriend who can do dinner and a movie with her. i'm not even sure it's entirely about her desire for herself to do normal things. she is trying to climb back off that cliff, it's true. but i think a part of her knows that might not be possible anymore, and she wants tobias to fare better than she has. all the animorphs, pretty much, prefer to take on a burden themselves rather than foist it on one of the others. i think rachel feels, subconsciously, that going off the deep end wouldn't be as bad if she could feel sure that tobias were safely on shore. which is also typical of their relationship, that they seek in each other what they don't find in themselves; tobias, who's always hated himself for being weak, admires rachel's strength, and rachel, who's so harsh, responds to tobias's gentle nature.

that longevity in the wild thing, i can't deal. moving on.

"I'm glad you made it Tobias You're our eyes. Our ears. Our air force If we lost you we'd be nothing Like Joan of Arc without her sword. Patton without his pearl-handled pistols . . ."
/Saddam without the twenty-eight palaces, the special Republican Guard, and a jar of anthrax? Stop the flattery, man. You're making me blush./ We both laughed. It felt good to hear Jake say I was indispensable, but with Jake you could never be sure anymore what was sincere. And what was just expedient.
heh, the saddam line makes me laugh. and in this and his subsequent observations about jake, i like that tobias is basically okay with the fact that jake has become kind of ruthless when it comes to his own people (until, of course, the very end).

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